(I have none.)
Roommate: Some people consider Columbus Day to be Italian Heritage Day.
Me: I didn’t know he was Italian.
Roommate: Yeah, he was from Genoa.
Me: Mmm. . .That’s where ham comes from.
Happy Columbus Day! or Italian Heritage Day! or Indigenous People’s Day! or Day You Don’t Have to go to Work/School! or Day You Remember How Terrible Columbus Really Was! or. . .You know what, just, Happy Monday.